My name is Mandy. I have a blog. Which I don't update apparently.
Writer's block. Flu. Husband away again last week.
Pick your excuse.
Aaaaaaanyway, I thought I'd give you something to amuse you. Make you laugh. Help you spend your almost TGIF day.
You see I like to take photos. But that means that I'm rarely in them. So, occasionally, when I'm feeling adventurous, I try the "shoot yourself" look. Many people look very glamorous doing that. Me?
Exhibit 1:
Cut the other person's head off. Make sure you have the worst camera angle possible so your nose is magnified exponentially.
Does it get better? Oh yes.
Exhibit 2:
Cut your head off while getting in the other half of the subject matter. Ensure that you are sufficiently frustrating everyone so that New Year's moment is truly captured.
Exhibit 3:
Make sure you marry a man whose head is twice the size of your own. Then, attempt to be a classy looking couple at a wedding with 6 chins between you.
If you forget to wear powder (oh hell, I don't even own powder), you too can shine like a grease ball, even though you actually have chronically dry skin.
Exhibit 4:
Avoid the multiple chin look by allowing everyone to see up your nostrils. Make every tendon in your neck stand out.
Exhibit 5:
Take all the lessons you've learned and combine them all for the grand finale.
See? Aren't ya glad you still come around here?
10 Heard through the grapevine:
I love that exhibit 4 makes you two look like Siamese twins!
At least you're in some photos. I'm pretty sure my kids are going to think that their memories of me are just figments of their imagination. I'm in zero pictures over the last decade, I swear!
Love it!!
In this age of digital photography we are all taking more photos....like these. HA. Made me laugh out loud; thanks. I needed that. I could scroll through my camera right now and find more of the same. It's all good though....
Great post.
Mandy,
We take the same sort of self portraits.
I even bought a tripod to hopefully help me take better ones, but no...even after lining up the shot...I still manage to have more chins than a chinese phone book, or cut someone out, or have only half a head...or capture myself mid speech/laugh... but alas...I keep trying.
Not as brave as you though, I don't keep mine, I delete them!!
I like how David basically looks like a growth (tumour?) on you in every shot.
You should get him looked at. Something is not right.
Oh em gee that made me laugh...
... I almost squirted coke zero cherry out my nose!
Those are classics, seriously, I think that someday you'll probably want to frame them.
Don't even get me started on my attempts to take my own picture in a mirror. How on earth do people do that?!
Thanks so much for the laugh out loud! I'm still giggling.
FADKOG beat me to the siamese twin bit. And now that I think about it, we probably only have three photos of us together and those were at our wedding. Double chins be damned, you guys still look good.
Okay...totally laughed my way through the whole post! Loved the pics! At least you try!! I don't remember the last picture that was taken of me!
That was hilarious!
Post a Comment